Wiolawa Press: Aliens and UFO Art - Part 1

This will be the first in a series of articles about this wonderful webpage. Enjoy!

Synopsis: Just about every major public figure in the world (except, apparently, Ralph Nader) is a reptilian alien. Barbara "Wiolawa" Crouse-Brown, the webmistress, claims to be able to prove this by taking images of the people in question, zooming in on their faces, and applying several Photoshop filters until they look like they have snakes crawling around on them, or their faces are made of snakes, or they just don't look normal. Every major world event is just another part of the reptilian plot to drive us to extinction, and every new disease is genetically engineered for some purpose or another.
Craziness hallmarks: Random capitalized words, numerology, overanalyzing simple words like "me" (it apparently means House of the Mother Alien Reptile), general paranoia, odd neologisms and language idiosyncrasies
Overall insanity factor: 10/10

Wiolawa Press is a true diamond in the rough. It's not very widely known, certainly not on the level of Time Cube, and in my opinion undeservedly so. Wiolawa is easily as prolific as Gene Ray and every bit as entertaining. Spanning nearly six years, this site is like a delicious plate of bite-sized Hot Pockets waiting to burst open, and every single year, archived separately, is jam-packed with the filet mignon of Internet insanity.

Hang on to your tin foil hats, folks. We're going in.
http://www.wiolawapress.com

The first thing you'll notice, undoubtedly, is the weird language. Some examples:
REMEMBER MACHIEVELLIAN LIARS ARE MAC-maj-mag-mak=muck
WAR WITH CHINA ASAP..... look for the Draconian alignments always... and realize that WWWIII designed by the LIZARD HOUSE OF KON_TROL is meant to bring in THEIR NEW WORLD ORDER.... THE US WILL NOT DEFEAT AFGHANISTAN.. IMPOSSIBLE... INFACT IT IS SHAPING UP TO BE QUITE A RIDICULOUS E_VENT OF THE LIZARDS>>> 10-27-01---still having problems BOYZ? 3-3 02
NOTICE like the PHAROAHS of EYGYT in the BIBLE the STAFF OF AQUINO has an ALIVE EYE~SNAKE! FROM THE SOLARIZED FILTER JUST ADDED THE RED FILTER SINCE THE SATANISTS LOVE THIS COLOR FOR THEIR BLOOD RED RELIGION OF THE FEEDING OFF OF HUMANITY! EVIL OVERLORD COL. ASSHAT MICHAEL AQUINO WHO FEEDS OFF OF HUMANITY!

CAPITAL LETTERS are often ADDED for EMPHASIS or FOR NO APPARENT reason at all. ALL THE major REputaBLE NEWS SOURCES in the world do THIS. There have been rumours that the reptilian aliens who are disguised as world leaders cannot understand human emotion, and that's why they are trying to create alien-human hybrids! So perhaps adding emotion to printed text is a kind of code that they can't decipher, like using Navajo to fool grey-type aliens into getting smallpox vaccinations like they did in that one documentary TV show.

Of course, the aliens are everywhere, much like in the hit 1983 TV miniseries V, obviously cobbled together by human spiritual warriors who saw the reptoid invasion coming 20 years in advance. Then again, if you believe what's on this site and others, they've been in and out of Earth for millennia, and may or may not originally be from Planet X. Anywho, though their imitations of humanity are convincing to the naked eye, you can actually detect a disguised alien quite easily! Simply run the picture of a suspected alien through Photoshop's Solarize and Find Edges filters. Look for any signs of obvious reptilian-ness, like lines on the face. If that doesn't work, throw a few more random filters on there until you get something.

Let's try it! Get out Photoshop. your safety pencils, and a circle of paper. Today we'll be Photoshopping the aliens from V! This is kind of a no-brainer, since we know they're actually reptiles in disguise anyway.


All right, we've got a good picture. Make sure it's compressed in some way or another -- uncompressed pictures only hide the reptilians' true identity. Now let's solarize and find edges. This is the standard technique, and works like a charm on obvious reptilians such as Camilla and George W. Bush.


Zooming in, we can see it's starting to work!


But I think we can do better. Let's solarize again and find edges again! If doing it just once brings out some reptoid impostors, obviously doing it twice will be twice as effective!


Finally, the truth comes out! But we're not done quite yet. Some of our readers may not acknowledge the deep significance of this, so we'll have to helpfully label it to point some things out to the casual viewer. The true professional uses the red paintbrush tool for just this purpose.


Now the unhappy ghost (see his sad ghostly frown?) caught in the Medusan locks of the dark-haired maven on the right can be seen very clearly, as can the snake-patrol searching the blonde's shoulder for traitors and small rodents or insects. Note also the reptoid Nazi communist satanist pedophile ships in tow behind the both of them, bearing a striking resemblance to the ones accompanying Planet X on its journey to Earth a few years back! Regardless, obviously the producers of the show MUST have been in league with the Reptilians to know about the menacing brown dwarf so far in advance of its cataclysmic destruction of the Earth on March 13, 2003.

Clearly Wiolawa will be a pivotal figure in the world's future, as we will need a true spiritual awakening in order to be saved from certain reptilian doom. But, you ask, surely the reptilians have taken notice of her victories in uprooting their agents! Why haven't they struck back at her? Has she ever communicated with them?

These questions and more will be answered in Wiolawa Press, Part 2: Wiolawa Harder.